Attempts at Perfection & It’s Failures

“Have no fear of perfection – you will never achieve it.” – Salvador Dali

I can’t get my head around it.  Does anyone with diabetes who is motivated in their management think they can’t achieve perfection?  Yes I said CAN’T.

As a Person With Diabetes I think that not only can I achieve challenging feats beyond my day to day life, such as ascending the Peruvian Tundra to over 15,000 ft BUT I can also achieve perfection with my diabetes.

As a PWD I know that this mindset is superfluous.  BUT, I still want to pursue it, just in case I can achieve it.  You never know, right??  Isn’t that a great goal to set and pursue. Almost like a cure, really.

BUT….yes, I said BUT…I am reminded of how the attempts of trying to be all that to my endocrine system and diabetes management isn’t that simple. Even after coming into 40 years of living with diabetes and being a Mom of a PWD for 14 years.

I am reminded on our flight to Peru, no matter how hard I attempt to make my diabetes perfect, I cannot.

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Upon take off I am aware of the potential impact the air pressure can have on my insulin pump delivery.  The rule of thumb despite there is not total clinical evidence with regards to this is to disconnect on ascension and descending. Why?  The talk of the town is that upon take off the pressure can change the delivery of insulin to cause a low blood sugar. During the flight the pressure change can create air bubbles resulting in missed insulin after landing.

I have experienced this throughout the past 14 years of travel on an insulin pump but was not aware of the ‘talk’ that circulated about this until the past few years.

So, whether clinically relevant or not, I decide to take heed to try and avoid this.

We are prepared for take off at Pearson.  Status quo.  Prior to boarding I check my Continuous Glucose Sensor.  All is good in my diabetes world.

As the plane positions itself for take off on the runway I disconnect from my site with the intention of reconnecting within a few minutes after the rapid ascension is complete.

I am excited.  I am thinking about our trip, the flight which is 21 hours with stop overs.  In my mind I am running through what we packed versus the list I print and check off.  I am nervous.  I am landing in a city that has an elevation of over 8,000 feet.  I am worried after the stories I am told of elevation sickness.

The airline steward serves our snacks.  I give it to Steve.  Packed full of gluten. I don’t need a snack anyway.  I’m not hungry.  I look at some magazines.  I do a Word Search.

Several hours pass by.  I start to feel like the Sahara desert lives in my mouth. My stomach feels like a brick made a home in it.  My chest feels heavy.

I question these feelings.  Why?  It feels like I am high.  How come?  I don’t clue in to check my sugar though.  I attribute it to the elevation, the dry air, the excitement.

The steward comes around again.  Offers snacks.  I pass mine onto Steve’s again.  Maybe if I eat and drink a ton of water I’ll feel better.  I take one of my gluten free bars out of my bag.  I bolus, I eat. I feel like crap.

Is it the flight?  The cabin pressure?  I just can’t make sense of it.  Obviously my brain cells are not firing on all cylinders.  Doesn’t being on guard all the time with managing diabetes do that to a person?

Then…I get an itch at my site.  And so I scratch. It is so itchy I must lift my shirt enough to place my hand under so I can make skin to skin contact to find satisfaction. While scratching I realize my tubing at my site is flopping back and forth….I am NOT attached to my site.

I forgot to re-connect after take off.  That was 3 hours ago.

In my effort to achieve diabetes management perfection, I fail.

Now, forgiveness is mine. I am so insulin sensitive that I only end up with a BG of 11 mmol/L.  I check for ketones as well.  They measure at only 0.3.  So…I correct for the gluten free bar and basal rates missed as well as a small amount for the trace amount of ketones.  It takes several hours to come down and even though my sugar is only 11, I feel like I’m on the edge of DKA.  I  know what it’s like, I’ve been there.

We land in Peru and I am almost in target.

After that incident I make a promise with myself.  Disconnecting on a flight to achieve perfect blood sugars is not a goal I wish to achieve.  For what I wish to achieve I fail.  I avoid a potential low but instead end up high and feeling terrible.

What’s the lesser of two evils.  I can’t answer that but I will tell you I will no longer disconnect my site.

I’m OKAY!! Really!?

Wedding Cruise5With the exception of the time we dated in high school, my husband Steve is diagnosed with Type 1 spousal diabetes for just under four years.

It may seem silly but I assumed in all this time he knew diabetes like I did.  I can’t even tell you why I thought he would learn 39 years of living with Type 1 diabetes as I have experienced by observing signs, symptoms and random sharing of how I feel in certain situations.  He has never had formal education in the less than 4 years we have been together.

The moment I understood I need to share my life with diabetes more?

We arrived in Lima, Peru.

After settling on the last leg of our journey we decide to head out in search of a few markets and sites for some art pieces.

On the way back, my pump alarms that my sensor is telling me my blood sugars is 4 mmol/L.  My sugar is going down.  Stupidly, I have no sugar on me…Steve is so good he usually does have lifesavers in his pocket…but he has none.

I feel it is lower than 4 mmol/L.  But I am stubborn.  Steve asks if I want him to go into a store and get sugar.  I say it’s OK .

First, when my sugar trends towards low but I feel like I am not in danger, I don’t treat with rapid acting sugar, I set a temporary basal rate.  I think it’s a control thing.  I want to change the stupid system that really works…just to see if I can make it better.  I am so anti-sugar….I really want to take it…mental block.

So…I say to Steve, it’s okay, I’ll set a temp rate.

And we keep walking.

And several minutes later I become dull.  And quiet.  I lack my bubbly, sunshine Type A personality.

Steve knows but doesn’t know.  He hasn’t experienced such an extreme moment like this.

I personify strength.  Knowledge.  Power.  Ability.  I am never the victim.  He trusts that. Even thought his gut tells him different.

DBB Hypo Peru

So he trusts me and my choice.

Until I mumble I want ice cream.  And he asks further questions.  And I am indecisive and vague.

We end up in a grocery store a few blocks away from our hotel.  He asks me several times what I want to get….I don’t know.  In my mind I want to ask him to help me.  Save me from this terrible prison in my mind of wanting to be in control.  Not to ask for help.  I will take care of myself.  I won’t confess I have failed.  I won’t ask.  I refuse.  I won’t.  I have done this since I was a little girl.  My (mis)behaviour trumps my voice.

I am no good to anyone.  I know it.  I am too far gone to say that.

Steve finally suggests and I agree.

We pay out at the cash and I inhale.

Many minutes later Tracy returns.

Later that night we debrief.  He tells me…”I knew, but I didn’t because you know!”, but I did.  And I failed to tell him.  Thankfully he saw it today. Exactly what I just described.

He tells me “…from now when when you say “It’s okay, I’ll set a temporary basal rate.”  I am going to pop into a store and buy some candies.”

And he will tell me.  “You need this candies”.  And I now I will take them.  Regardless of how bad I want to be in control.  Because, we have this consensual contract.

It’s good to share my diabetes.  A liberation.  Enlightening.  It is a relief to give a very small piece of it to someone else.  Even though it is only a very small piece of what my mind thinks of 24-7-365, if feels good. Despite how much control I want.  And how hard it is to let go.

Travelling with My Pharmacy

DBB Huchay Cusco Blog

There will a few posts/Blogs about my travels to and within Peru.

BUT..

I feel this post in particular is a huge one and is pressing upon me to prioritize even though it’s not in order.

We spent Christmas Eve in Agues Calientes. We planned to climb Machu Picchu Christmas Day.

I became very ill with a very high fever and ultimately sinus congestion, sore throat, fatigue among other things.

I am proud of the way the situation turned out as I recovered very quickly compared to most times I experience this. My husband questioned if I should take part in the venture to Machu Picchu but I insisted despite feeling down and out I would not miss such an amazing opportunity. This is a chance in a lifetime!!! And so we did.

With that being said, after we returned to Cusco a few days later we made plans to take part in a two day trek up the Andes mountains, through the Peruvian Tundra. We would then be hosted by a family overnight before descending back down the next day to another town a few hours away from our starting point.

We reach an elevation of 15,100 feet. Understanding that breathing would be a challenge at the best of times, I am overly concerned that with my congestion and swollen throat it would present greater issues.

On our way to the drop off point 1 1/2 hours away by jeep, I ask our guide to stop at a pharmacy to buy cold medication to help keep the symptoms from being too overwhelming throughout the climb.

As I walk into the pharmacy I take note this is the very first lesson I learn.  Never assume I can go away for 2 weeks and be healthy the whole time. I usually pack cold medications, gravol etc for those ‘just in case’ moments.

This is the first time I didn’t take my personal pharmacy with me. Sigh.

Our guide Henry takes me into the pharmacy in Cusco. I tell Henry in English that I need an anti-histamine/anti-inflammatory. I expect something along the lines of Advil Sinus & Cold or Buckley’s.

After the Pharmacist asks Henry a few more questions in Spanish….”Is it altitude sickness?”…”No, I had a very high fever, sore throat and sinus congestion.”…He recommends a product.

I take a ticket to the cash booth/dispensary at the front of the store. She gives me the box of medication. I am so relieved I will have the meds to help with the congestion, I don’t consider that I didn’t tell the pharmacist I have T1 diabetes OR that I took time to read the ingredients.   At this point I don’t make the connection that Dexametasona (in English “Dexamethasone”) is a steroid!!! I mean, come on, I am a Nurse. I should know the 5 R’s!!

AND I can’t buy a steroid over the counter in Canada! For good reason!

I am told to take one pill now (it is 7:30am) and again at supper. I can take it twice a day for a few days.

Within an hour I can feel the relief. I am overjoyed….until…

Fast forward to that evening and into the overnight…AND the next day…my blood sugars begin to climb…and climb…and climb.

I take insulin corrections like drinking water with no change. Not even a flicker in my Continuous Glucose monitor display. My finger pokes confirm all is not right within my diabetes world.

I reflect back on when we arrived in Cusco. Within a day I was setting temporary basal rates on my insulin pump for low blood sugars and now??? I am insulin resistant in the Andes Mountains??

I play scenarios in my mind. Is it the altitude? Is it dehydration? Is it the anaerobic feedback from the intense activity which leads us to experiencing burning leg muscles, shortness of breathe so bad our lungs are burning?

When I work out at the gym and do intense heavy weights my sugars spike. When I do hill training when I run I get the same effect. Is this the same?

At this point I haven’t made the connection yet that the cold meds contain steroids.

I do think that in part, the intensity of the climb did cause an adrenalin surge that did cause my need for more insulin….pair it with an exogenous steroid in my cold meds and here is a recipe for blood sugar disaster.

My key take away?

Bring my own cold meds and pharmacy.

If ever in an emergency that I require medications while in another country, make sure to tell them I have diabetes.

If and when I decide to ascend to 15,100 feet (or higher), take note and act that if it feels anaerobic, increase my insulin rates to accommodate to it.

No doubt it is a tough balance to achieve but I wouldn’t want to throw my hands in the air and not keep playing the game. Next time I want to improve on this experience. I accept my sugars will never be perfect in these situations especially, but, I will do my best.DBB Dexalor

How Green is the Grass?

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How Green is the Grass?

This pic is where the movie Laura Croft Tomb Raider was taped. We were there when we visited Ta Prohm at Ankor Wat in Cambodia. I’m a big Tomb Raider fan. it was pretty amazing to be where it was filmed. The tree you see in the pic was jaw dropping. It was also amazing to think that something with such grandiose roots, reaching for the sky could survive in such barren conditions. It seemed it was in a totally foreign environment in which it needed to survive, yet it thrived & boasted so with its huge roots.

Thinking about that tree I reflect back in time. I remember being a “Diabetes Consultant” i.e. a sales rep for Novo Nordisk Inc. I fought hard to get that position. I knew I was fortunate to be there. I also was confident I had the passion to move it forward & benefit others, namely Health Care Practitioners. My goal was to influence so they would improve the lives of those living with diabetes en masse. I wanted to change the world of diabetes. I had been on the other side working in I.C.U. & I wanted to stop the madness. I believed that the best way to make that impact was in this way. Because I believed so passionately & so deeply about ‘my’ cause I passionately believed Novo Nordisk’s products were the best out there. No other pharmaceutical company selling insulin, pen tips, insulin pens or Type 2 oral agents could have a product as good as the one I sold. Their pipeline & success was overwhelming. Based on my steadfast belief & guidance from those who taught me to sell, I learned to sell & I sold well.

Did I sell like a pharma rep? I have & will maintain I didn’t. I had a hard time asking for the business, closing the sale. Instead, I believed through building relationships, earning trust & education inadvertently I did sell. When I left the company I was vying for 1st place out of 65 reps in less than 5 years. When I began the territory I looked after was flat lined, when I left it was growing in double digits. I steadily climbed the ladder of sales success. My drive wasn’t because of the money or recognition. Why did I ‘want it all’? Because I wanted to tell others that I succeeded based on building trust, relationships AND most importantly educating my clients with passion because I believed. I believed in the best for people living with diabetes & I wasn’t afraid to say so. My clients reassured me voluntarily they heard me loud & clear & I lead them to believe. They wrote the products I sold because they trusted that I would provide for them what was needed to take care of their patients living with diabetes. I would give them the information they needed to help them empower their patients.

Little did I know I was establishing my diabetes roots & standing out in an environment that is tough to penetrate. I was often asked why I wasn’t a diabetes educator. I just couldn’t envision myself doing it. I liked the rush of sales & the impact I made. I loved the relationships I had. I could walk into clinics & see Docs that other reps couldn’t. I didn’t think there was anywhere else I could make such a huge impact.

After my tenure with Medtronic, I honestly didn’t know where I belonged & believed exiting the diabetes world may be best for me to take care of myself & my family. What I learned was, when the roots are deep, it’s really, really hard to transplant somewhere else.

Seven weeks today I have been a Diabetes Nurse Educator at the most amazing clinic for Type 1’s. I don’t know of any other like this. As I said, first, I didn’t think I’d ever be an ‘educator’, which now I see I always was. Secondly but most importantly & the reason for this Blog is the deep roots I have established with the relationships & trust I developed over the past 9 years. All of these things have brought me to where I needed to be. Many I work with were my pharma clients, now they are my colleagues.

The greatest thing I have learned in the last 7 weeks? For all the products; insulin, meters, insulin pens, pen tips & pumps….my passion for certain products has dissipated a lot. I have realized & I have preached it…each persons diabetes is unique. It is their own. The product needs to chosen for the lifestyle of the person living with diabetes…not the other way around. I sit at my desk listening to my patients & I ask…what tools & education can I share with you to empower you to live with your Diabetes Beyond Borders?

The roots just keep getting deeper.

Gaining Perspective

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Gaining Perspective

This is me at age 8. It was 3 years after being diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes. I am standing at the entrance of Camp Huronda, a summer camp sponsored by the Canadian Diabetes Association for Type 1 children & teens. It was the first time away from home longer than a day since I was diagnosed with diabetes & hospitalized for 10 days in 1975. I learned to inject myself with insulin within a few days of being at Camp Huronda. From that day forward I didn’t want anyone else injecting me. I liked that I could control how my injections felt & when the needle was going in.

Fast forward to 1987. At the age of 16, one morning my Mom finds me in bed, unresponsive, laying in my vomit. After calls to my Paediatrician & attempts to give me fast acting sugar with no success, my parents rush me to the hospital. The things I remember of that morning are Dad standing me in the snow in my bare feet to get me into the car as I refused to, seeing my church as they drove by it & watching my Mom cry at the foot of my bed in Emerg. A few days later as I lay in my hospital bed I noticed that the nurses caring for me didn’t know a lot about diabetes. I mentioned this to my Mom. To this day it seems almost unbelievable to think my Mom prophesied my future career without knowing how big of an impact I would make in the world of diabetes. When I told her my thoughts, she said to me, “You can change that. You can educate them so they know.” She encouraged me to go into Nursing.

If you go back to several of my Blogs you can read about the many experiences I have had living with diabetes & being a parent of a child, teen & now young adult living with diabetes.

Fast forward to 1999. After working in a Licensed Daycare as the School Nurse & caring for 2 children with Special Needs for 2 1/2 years, I decided to start a Home Daycare so I could be home with Cayla & Kurtis. Within 6 months I had a ‘full house’. It was a very busy time but I loved that I could be home for my children & create a home atmosphere for the little ones who couldn’t be home with their parents. Once Kurtis started Grade 1 I felt it was time to gain some hospital experience. While running the home daycare I completed my Critical Care Certificate. Working at the daycare & running the home daycare taught me so many things; time management, communication, creativity, nutrition, working with Special Needs, how to be calm when chaos is all around.

I still remember my first interview at the hospital. The 2 managers interviewing me mentioned I didn’t have any experience. I asked them how was I going to get experience if they didn’t hire me? I surprised myself that I asked them that question. I wasn’t one to challenge anybody. They were surprised too. That got me in.

After several years of working in several areas at the hospital & particularly the Intensive Care Unit, which I loved, I didn’t like the fact I was caring for people with complications, mostly from Type 2. There was one patient who died from complications of Type 1. It devastated me. She wasn’t much older then me. My colleagues would ask me certain questions about diabetes. I liked that. It didn’t take long for me to realize I was at the wrong end of the diving board. My time in ICU was invaluable. I learned time management, critical thinking, stamina, diplomacy, focus, patience, perseverance, when it was the right time to cry when I lost a patient & when I needed to hold back my tears,. I also learned that there are times that the truth needs to be told no matter how hard it is to hear. Working in ICU made it very challenging for me to keep my sugars in check. A critical situation would drive them sky high & a missed break could bring me low.

In 2002 I attended the JDRF Walk For the Cure. To this day, I don’t know what possessed me to do what I did. Kurtis & I used a Lifescan glucose testing meter. I heard there was a new one on the market & I wanted one for each of us. I walked over to the Lifescan booth & began talking to the rep. He gave me 2 new meters. After a few minutes of conversation, my mouth opened & without plan or thought I asked him if his company was hiring. Huh? What did I just do? It just so happened that he was being promoted & his position was opening. WHAT?!? Timing is everything they say. So it was with this as well. The interview process went smoothly, the offer was ready to be presented when an internal applicant surfaced. As with most companies, he was given the position. How did I feel? I was okay with it. I didn’t think it was the right time. The kids were still young & I had a great job-share position that was flexible with shift work. It worked for our family at the time. The Rep I met from Lifescan told me he would keep me connected & that he did. My foot was in a door I didn’t even know existed.

In 2004 I ended up with one of the best jobs I could ever imagine having. I became a Diabetes Consultant for Novo Nordisk. It was one of the hardest but most rewarding jobs. I learned Type 1 & Type 2 diabetes inside out & backwards. The company kept me current in Clinical Studies & relevant literature. What I liked most about it was meeting Family Physicians for the first time & them telling me they don’t ‘do insulin’. Several years later I had these same GP’s thanking me for teaching them & how much easier it was then they thought. Through out my years at Novo Nordisk my Mom’s words echoed in my mind several times. I educated Nurses, Dieticians, Doctors, Pharmacists and Nurse Practitioner’s. I did business on all levels of health care including hospital contracts & nursing homes. Working at Novo Nordisk helped me learn time management, business planning, triaging, focus, drive, passion, knowledge about every insulin available on the market, knowledge about every oral anti-hyperglycemic agent on the market, every insulin pen, syringe & pen tip available & it’s implications on therapy.

One of the most difficult decisions I ever made in my careers was leaving Novo Nordisk to work for Medtronic. It provided me an opportunity to expand my career, work experience and meet more Health Care Providers working in the field of diabetes. It was a short tenure as Medtronic decided to restructure the Corporation both in the U.S. & Canada. I was one of ~ 100 in Canada who lost their jobs as a result. Being a Territory Manager at Medtronic taught me many skills I needed to become better at or hadn’t experienced. It was a valuable experience despite the outcome. I learned about all of the insulin pumps provided by the medical device companies. I got to know Pumps & Continuous Glucose Monitoring really, really well. Little did I know how much of an advantage that would be. I worked within a team of 3 & communication was essential to follow up & close each sale. I learned how to work directly with the consumer & their needs. Though out the years I learned how to read body language & verbal tone very well. It took a long time but I learned to listen to my gut. For the most part it was right.

After I lost my job at Medtronic, I decided I wanted to leave the world of diabetes. I didn’t know where I wanted to be. I was certain I didn’t want to be an educator. I couldn’t see myself sitting at a desk staring at someones blood sugars, listening to their excuses. Why did I have this perception? I have thought about that a lot. How could I think like that given I live with diabetes? I think that in my mind a diabetes clinic consists of Type 1 & Type 2 together, intertwined…somehow connected but shouldn’t be. I didn’t want to educate like that. They are 2 different animals & so they should be treated as such. It wasn’t the patients fault I felt like that, it is how clinics are structured that frustrates me. So…I went out on my own as an educator & consultant through my company “Diabetes Beyond Borders” to change that. As a result Diabetes Beyond Borders has over 6,700 ‘likes’ on Facebook. I became a Certified Pump Trainer for Medtronic & Accu-Chek. I had a contract with a large on- line pharmacy in which I created marketing materials, provided education on insulin pump infusion sites & cartridges.

I have applied & been through several interviews for diabetes sales jobs. I would’ve taken them if they were offered but I just didn’t feel it anymore. What was I meant to do? Where was my passion?

A few months ago I was invited to a conference. It is called Type 1 Think Tank. It’s mandate is to more or less “think out side the box” to provide better care & outcomes for people living with Type 1 diabetes. I didn’t realize I was that important! I didn’t realize my experiences were so valued. At the conference I met a long time friend & colleague. She is the founder of the Charles H Best Diabetes Centre. I called on her clinic as a Diabetes Consultant & Territory Manager from 2004-2009. My son Kurtis went there briefly after his diagnosis in 2000 before a Paediatric clinic opened closer to home. The founder, Marlene, approached me and asked if I would be interested in a position as a Diabetes Nurse Educator. I never turn down opportunity but I was pensive given it was a 2 hour/day commute & I would be ‘stuck’ inside 4 walls 8 hours/day.

As soon as I sat down to the interview I understood why I had experienced so much throughout the years. This is exactly where I needed to be, where I want to be. I just didn’t know it. I have travelled down a road of learning & ultimately making an impact though all levels of diabetes. It was time to share those experiences with the people that really, really mattered. It was time to share my experiences with the children, teens, young adults, adults & their families living with Type 1 diabetes.

How To Cross the Road

How To Cross the Road

In June 2012 we travelled to Vietnam and Cambodia.  It is considered a trip of a life time.

This picture is one of the streets of Ho Chi Minh City in Vietnam.  One of the first strategies we learned; how to cross the street without getting maimed or killed.  The bikes were a barrage with what seemed to be no break.  There were very few traffic lights.  The motorcyclists seem to be on a mission to travel from point A to point B.  Period.  It was quite a sight to see.  It was organized chaos.

It reminded me of a symphony.  The music was in front of them and they played at the right time with the right notes. We wish we could see the music so we could read and play it too.

The picture you see and the description above is how best to describe my mind.

I have a plan, similar to crossing the road in Ho Chi Minh City.  I need to get across.  The great part is, I can see the other side of the road.  The challenge is all of the opportunities and work that comes with meeting these goals is overwhelming me, like the constant barrage of motorcycles with what looks like no rules, traffic signs or signals.

Several challenges are new to me thus a few major learning curves.  I am in a different world with different rules.  Many opportunities have recently come to me which I have wanted for quite some time.  These opportunities are very promising, but, have changed the focus I thought was in place.  With that comes an abrupt change in how to complete the ‘BIG PLAN’.

I am aware of the multitudes of phrases and quotes that summarize how to eat an elephant, take baby steps and carpe diem.  Believe me, that is top of mind each day.

I make lists, I cross them off.  I thought crossing off the little stuff first, leaving the really big stuff last would be best.  I understand now this is not going to get me across the street.  It’s like taking a step on the road, seeing the bikes and stepping back on the sidewalk.

How did we cross the street in Ho Chi Minh City?  We looked for the biggest gap of motorcycles.  We held hands tight and began to cross.  We were concerned we would be hit.  We were surprised when we came in front of a bike that it would stop and let us cross.  We finally had the music.  We were learning how to be part of the symphony.

The Vietnamese motorcyclists chuckled at us.  I am certain I could hear them say in their chuckle…”Foreigners.”.  It was a huge sense of accomplishment to get to the other side.  And…we learned the motorcyclists had compassion and understanding of our goal.

It is time for my mind and actions to know and do the same.

Eden’s Journey

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DBB FB Eden Blog Pic 1

Hey Everyone! My name is Eden, I am 21 years old, a student, a girl trying to lose weight and well a Type 1 Diabetic. I thought I would share my weight loss journey, and all the tips and tricks that I have found helpful. But first a little about me, and my journey to where I am.
I was diagnosed when I was 17 years old with type one diabetes. It does not run in my family, and I was the “lucky” one who got it ha ha. When I was younger I also battled with a disease called Graves disease, which weakened my immune system (luckily I am still in remission), and the doctors believe that this is why I got Diabetes. While staying in the hospital, I realized that I am going to be on my own dealing with this disease. I had horrible hospital staff, uneducated people trying to teach me about Diabetes! One nurse thought I get my insulin after my meals, and another decided to tell my mother who was in a state of panic, that I may go into a coma at any given minute if my sugars were low….needless to say my mother had a breakdown. It was not a great start to say the least, and has continued to be a crappy situation. So ever since I was diagnosed, it’s been me, my body, and well the internet trying to figure this whole thing out!
So I thought I would write a daily blog post about my weight loss journey I am currently on  It is hard for diabetics sometimes because unlike “normal” people, we have to make sure our sugars are constantly ok…no highs or lows, and our heart rate is okay. I hate using the word “normal” but I think you understand what I mean. I am still trying to figure out what works best for my body, but I have learned A LOT throughout my journey thus far. I have always been slightly overweight, but when I was diagnosed I gained almost 35 pounds….I was shocked. All this happened during the month of my prom and graduation. Needless to say…I hated the photos! I was 205 pounds and I felt depressed, and I still battle with these feelings. It took me a long time to start being healthy. During October 2012 I joined a local nutrition program, and I loved it! I did not follow it completely and I did not do a lot of physical exercise, but I still dropped 10 pounds within the first 2 months! I was so happy, and during December and the Christmas dinners….I lost track of my program. It suddenly clicked in me that why am I doing this to myself? My university graduation is around the corner, and I do not want to feel the same way I did in high school! So in January I started to follow the program. It is a bit hard to change how you eat and I am still learning 😛 I go to the gym 4 sometimes 5 days a week (hard with my schedule of 6 courses, work and homework!) But of course I have had a bit of a battle with my sugars which I think I finally “cracked the code” on. Needless to say I am 174 pounds now….31 pounds down from my heaviest! I would like to be around 145-150 pounds for my height (5’6). My graduation is on May 31, 2013 and I am hoping to get to 158-160 by graduation  It is going to be hard, but hopefully you will all support me  I will share photos of myself, and foods I make….I LOVE COOKING! And anything else I find interesting  Hopefully I inspire some of you with my story, and with my future posts  I won’t lie, it is difficult, but it is not as hard if you have someone you can connect with who understands what you are going through  You can follow me on instagram edenalexandriadaly to see my photos day-to-day 
Until Tomorrow!